Lisa tells me that a certain sweetie pie now has three jobs because he's working to get his own place.. I think that's pretty cool.. now, instead of me just gaining weight by buying ice cream, I'll be gaining weight because he's going to be working at Pizza Hut as well.. :)
.. oh my! :) *laughs* Lisa found that to be quite funny to say the least.. I had her laughing when I told her that, but she was happy because she thought I was starving myself.. she's so funny!
That's a good friend, tho. I mean, I'm not starving myself. It's just that the meds I'm on causes me to have a loss of appetite.. therefore, I'm not really eating as much as I use to.. because of that, I've lost twenty pounds..
I'm just glad that she's concerned about my well-being.. she's a pretty wowie friend, I'll tell you that..
I'm thinking that I might go over her house sometime this week.. maybe Friday.. she needs help w/a scrap book that she's doing for some class for school.. and since I've done some scrapbooking in the past, I told her I'd help her out a bit.. plus, both her mother and herself are going nutso! They just can't seem to pull it together.. so, Mary to the rescue..
Hey, maybe a certain SOMEONE could come and VISIT when I'm THERE! hehe.. *wink, wink*
Who knows! I just know that I'm MISSING her like mad crazy.. and I want to hang out with her.. even if I have to sell a damn kidney, I'll see that girl!
Sooo.. I want the Ataris CD.. the End Is Forever.. I have the Blue Skies.. blah blah blah.. and I really like it, but it doesn't have my IOU One Galaxy, and I really want that one sooooo bad!! I tried to get mi madre to get it for me, buuuuttt... she said no! maybe next time..
.. I think I might start working on my essay soon.. I should have started days ago, but it's not that hard really.. my mom thought it was this long ass report that would take me years to accomplish, but it's not.. just a five paragraph bitch.. BUT, still, the professor.. DAMN! she really likes to take the essays and chop them up and tell you like it is..
I haven't really done much of anything today.. I did talk to my lisa.. and I did write Will.. hmmm.. that was interesting.. I FINALLY wrote him this LONG ass letter about how I felt.. about how I thought our six year friendship was just done the tubes.. and I hated that feeling.. out of all the guy friends I've had in my life, he is one I just don't want to lose.. he's been there for me through EVERYTHING.. even when my ex-ex told me that I could NOT talk to him anymore because I didn't know him that well.. I just miss him.. I miss his emails.. his phone calls.. everything. He's probably one of the most amazing guys I know, and now.. he's just gone.. and god damn it, I wanna know why! I mean, personally, I have a right to know what's going on. So, I emailed him. And yes, I sent it. Normally, I just write it out, and then I put it in my draft folder so that I can simply say that I'm a wuss.. but, not this time.. and I can honestly say I'm a bit proud of myself..
.. but now, as I think about it, I'm feeling a little sick thinking about it. Oh my! I felt worse after I read the email he wrote after he visited me the day after Christmas.. oh my! He was soo god damn sweet.. But, it was too late. it was sent.. gone.. already in his inbox.. so, there was no turning back.. I mean, I put a LOT of feelings in that email.. A LOT! I just typed.. typed and typed and typed..
I can't think about it, tho, or it'll make me feel all sorts of sickness.. and I'll just feel like crap all day long..
WHY WHY WHY!!??
I often wonder why I put myself through all these emotions... I really liked him, as a friend.. he was so special to me.. and when I started to think I was losing him.. I just didn't know what to think.. I thought all sorts of thoughts.. and I'm still thinking them as I type..
Hmm.. hopefully, he'll write me back soon.. and he'll explain himself..
and I'll end this with Mary's famous last words to everything, "I don't know.."